I, EMMI VALVE, AM THE UNTIDIEST WOMAN ALIVE.
"I've always been untidy.." // "But it feels like it got out of my hands during few past years. - It could be 'cose I moved 4 (!!) times during that time. - I've becom such a little piggy!" // I feel like comparing this quality to severe obesiety. (I'm not referring to healt issues here.) "Help! - I'm stuck in here!" "No one can help me, I'm gonna be like this for ever!" "No, I can change! - I'm gonna start the change tomorrow! ...or next week!" // I don't want to be like this: "...So anguished!" // I miss peer comfort: Loose weight , how to get rid of your dishes easily, grab the hoover, tight tights, revolution of a messy missy.
"My dishes used to had mold on them, and the only way i could get a pair of clean cnickers was to hand was them in a sink!" // "But eighteen months ago I started this life style make over, - and my goal for the summer is to get familiar with cleaning and ironing curtains!" // "The very best thing of my succes is my new self confidence! It really shows in all aspects of life!" // "And I'm not saying that it's all becose of the new tidy me, but my single years are finally over too!" // In my dreams I'm like this: // And it doesn't feel very utopistic, since I do already have all this:
...But THIS I do not have: // It's been replaced with this: // "HEEELP MEEEE! - I make a mess before I've cleaned up the last one I made! - And I HATE cleaning!!" // "...But maybe I do hate more living like this..." // "But I have no time or energy! - I tried it once, and it didn't work! - It's so hard and expencive! - I think there's just something wrong with my bone structure!"
"...- ....Weeelll..." // "...On the other hand I have beaten some serious mental illnesses... - I've changed my diet... - I've gotten in to sports..." // "So why, WHY, wouldn't I beat the shit out of my UNTIDYNESS too?!" // " ...But how? - Where do I start? - And how to make the results last?" // "...I wonder if Martha Steward provides any personal training?" // The End! (At last!)
